Maria's Great Idea
by Alsike
Summary: This is jumpy, not entirely coherent, strange falling into femslash. the characterizations are implausible, but my excuse is that i never got a chance to watch the show. There are spoilers for Monsters and Leaving Normal, and i forgot about Kyle.


Maria's great idea

Pt 1

During Monsters, Maria is trapped in the den of Valenti

(MARIA is sitting in VALENTI'S office.) 

VALENTI: What are you afraid of Miss DeLuca? 

MARIA: A lot of things. 

VALENTI: You know what I think? I think someone is controlling you, controlling you through fear. Am I right? I'm here to help you. You know that don't you? Then tell me what's frightening you so badly. What you saw the night of the crash festival? You were in that parking lot to meet whom? 

MARIA: Nothing just headlights. 

VALENTI: Was there someone waiting for you? 

MARIA: I don't know I was unconscious. 

VALENTI: Maria. We both know why we're here, right? So what do you say we stop lying to each other? Okay? 

MARIA: Okay. 

VALENTI: Now who is Isabel Evans? 

MARIA: Um, she's a girl at school. 

VALENTI: Why does she make you so nervous? 

MARIA: I'm not nervous. 

VALENTI: Isabel and her brother Max. How well do you know them? 

MARIA: Not well, not well at all. 

VALENTI: You know I think you and I have something in common. I never got to know my father very well either. He was the sheriff around here about forty years ago. Did you know that? 

MARIA: No. 

VALENTI: Strong man. Strong hands. And he had this theory, you know? About aliens? That they were real. Sounds awfully silly doesn't it? 

MARIA: Yeah. 

VALENTI: That's what everybody thought. But my father, he was a very stubborn man, and he wouldn't let it go. He believed, and he lost his job over it. And he lost his family over it. Now I would hate to see that happen to any other family in this town, wouldn't you? Now that's one more thing that you and I have in common, isn't it? We've both seen things recently. Things that have made us start to wonder, made us question ourselves, our beliefs, and I think that if we share those things with each other, we're both going to feel a little bit safer. Now Isabel Evans. 

She's just a girl? 

MARIA: She's a special girl. 

VALENTI: What makes her special? 

This is the point where we leave canon and Maria gets a fabulous idea. ^Special, Fear, Nervous…^

MARIA: (breathes, forces herself to smile) because she's in love with me.

Valenti's eyebrows nearly rise off his face.

"You see," Maria continues, "you don't know exactly what was going on when we hit your car. I'll tell you everything," she's on a roll now, making it up as she goes along, she's also getting a little too into it, "I've never told anyone about this before, except Liz, 'cause I tell Liz everything, oh god. Isabel Evans makes me nervous because I have had a crush on her forever. You can't tell my mom, please, I don't know what she would do. But Liz started hanging out with Max, and I do whatever Liz does so that put me into a close proximity with Isabel and I've been nervous all the time since. You know what crushes do. And the thing at the UFO celebration, that was a big joke Max and his friends rigged up because Kyle told Liz you were freaked about these aliens, anyway, in the car Isabel had just told me that she liked me and I had never been more shocked in my life, so I didn't notice anything on the road. We're going out now." Maria finally breathed.

Valenti stutters, "Oh, that's nice."

"We had a date for today but had to break it for this."

"You shouldn't have done that, you can go now, it's fine."

"Thanks sheriff, you're very understanding, bye."

Maria disappears, home free she thinks.

Valenti goes to see Mrs. Evans.

"Oh, Sheriff, is something wrong?"

"No ma'am, I was just stopping by, to, um, to talk about your kids."

"They haven't done anything, have they? I mean I know about the accident, it's coming straight out of Isabel's allowance, but that's dealt with… right?"

"Mostly, it's all coming through quite well. I was more wondering why the accident happened, exactly."

"Kids get distracted, I certainly hope Ms. Deluca is not letting Maria drive for quite awhile, but she did bring Isabel home yesterday, so I suppose that's too much to hope for."

"What do you know about Maria Deluca? Have she and Isabel been friends long?"

"I haven't really met her. Isabel talks about her a lot, usually exasperatedly, but only recently. Isabel's brought most of her other friends home but not Maria. Why?"

"I spoke with Maria yesterday, she said, she said that she and Isabel were going out, goodbye Mrs. Evans, nice to see you." Valenti quickly strode back to his car. Mrs. Evans stared after him, shocked.

Isabel gets home

"Isabel dear, can we have a little talk."

"Can't mom, going out."

"With Maria?" Isabel stops on the stairs and turns around.

"No, she's working, do I usually go out with her?"

"Sheriff Valenti came to see me today." Isabel goes wide-eyed, expecting alien interrogation, "he told me that you and Maria were dating."

Isabel opens her mouth to deny the alien charge, then she registers what her mom has said, closes her mouth and opens it again in shock. She exercizes her jaws a few times trying to bring moisture back into her mouth.

"What? Mom, no, you can't believe that, I'm not dating Maria."

"It's okay, you don't have to be scared. I still love you."

"I'm not dating Maria! Listen to me, this is the truth, I am not dating Maria."

"I know you have a lot of secrets, I'm not going to treat you an differently. I wont let you get hurt. It's okay."

"Mom, believe me, this isn't one of my secrets."

"I love you darling, you can be honest with me."

Isabel hides her face in her hands and runs up the stairs locking herself into her room.

Max walks in just in time to catch the last bit.

"What's going on?"

"Max, Isabel is going through a lot right now. I want you to be especially considerate."

"What's going on?"

"Do you know who Isabel is dating right now?"

"Uhh, I think she's between boyfriends."

"What do you think of Maria Deluca?"

"She's fine, what does this have to do with anything?"

"No, what do you think of her, honestly, I haven't ever really met her."

"She's… fine, a little skittish, overly dramatic, flighty, but dependable in a clinch, Liz likes her. Now explain."

"Well, you see, Sheriff Valenti came over this afternoon, and he said that Maria had told him that she was going out with Isabel."

Max stops stunned. "What! She told him that!" he runs up the stairs.

"I don't understand."

At school Isabel confronts Maria, in the Eraser Room.

"You told the Sheriff we were dating!"

Maria cringes, "it seemed like a good idea at the time. I told him not to tell anyone."

"He came to my house, he told my mom!"

"Oh, bad, I'm sorry."

"You're sorry? You're _sorry!_ My mom thinks I'm a lesbian! And not only that, she thinks I'm going out with you! Of all people, you!"

"Well I couldn't think of anything else! Would you rather he told your mom you're from another planet?"

"At least I know what she'll say when she does find out, 'I still love you, you don't have to be scared,' I don't want her to think that about me. Your mom's finding out."

"Huh?"

"If this is what the Sheriff thinks fine, but your mom finds out next."

"No, you can't do this."

"After school we are going to your house and coming out to your mom, fun?"

"You can't make me do it!"

Isabel grabs her shoulders and pushes her against the wall. "If I have to suffer you are doing it with me, now when's your day off of work."

"I have Friday off this week," Maria mumbles.

"Great, we have a date."

"No, you are not going to let your friends see you with me. We can go to your house."

"My mom has to meet you? This isn't fair."

"What's wrong with me."

"The fact that you are you."

Maria throws an eraser at her. Isabel grabs one and throws it back. It becomes a full-fledged war. Isabel starts using her powers to levitate them at her. Maria finally leaps at her and pins her arms to her sides. Isabel falls backwards; the erasers all drop to the floor. They follow the erasers in a heap. The door bursts open and security rises up outside, a boy with a Polaroid pushes his way in and snaps a picture just as Maria looks up.

After the arraignment, Is & Maria are walking out of the school, to the Jetta. Isabel groans, "I am never going to live this down." There is a swarm of kids outside the building watching them.

Max stands next to the principal in a position of despair.

"Remind me to never raid the eraser room again," moaned the principal. Liz stands by Max, staring at a photocopy of the Polaroid.

"Did I miss something?" Liz rhetorocizes. "I mean, wouldn't she tell me? I'm her best friend, she was my first kiss, why didn't she tell me."

"Liz, they're not going out. It's all a big mistake."

"Look at this, they're all over each other." She shows him the photocopy.

"There is some rational explanation for this, and they are not dating."

"It kind of explains how nervous they were around each other though."

"Maria was scared by you know what."

"But she wasn't scared of you or Michael, just Is. Interesting."

"No, not interesting. They are not dating."

"I think they'd be good together."

"Liz! This is my sister you're talking about!"

"They would be. Isabel has an image problem anyway, she needs a shaking down."

"Oh really, and you're best friend isn't a psychopath?"

"What are you talking about, she survived Valenti."

"She told him they were dating."

"He knows?"

"Liz, my sister is not dating that freak you call a best friend, so stop thinking she is!"

"You're being a jerk! This is your sister, do you know how bad that must make her feel to know that you were so intolerant."

"I'm not intolerant! Stop accusing me of things I'm not doing. Isabel is not dating Maria, I know this, for a fact."

"I will ask Maria, then I will speak to you again. Now I'm going home. I have to work this afternoon."

"Fine." Max stood there disgruntled and worried, maybe they really were going out. It did make some sense. What if they were? Was he okay with it? He wasn't sure.

The confrontation of Amy Deluca

"Mom?"

"What is it?"

"I want you to, meet someone."

Amy turns around, "hello."

"Mom, this is, Isabel, she's…"

"Hi"

"She's a f…" Iz kicked her surreptitiously.

"She's my girlfriend." Maria's stomach thudded inside of her, she gasped for air and clung to the back of the chair and to Isabel's hand, which seemed oddly comforting, and though it shook as much as her own, it was on her side.

"Oh."

…

Liz sat on her balcony in her waitress uniform before she went to work. Her journal was open on her knees but she held the photocopy of the Polaroid and examined it. She slowly set it down and stared up at the sky. She gently touched her mouth.

"Liz!" a voice called from inside. She jumped, hurriedly shoving whatever she was imagining out of her mind. She quickly folded the photocopy and tucked it inside her journal. Then she shook it off and went inside.

…

Maria anxiously tapped a spoon against the edge of the table. Then she stood up, walked around the table poured a glass of water, took a sip, and left it on the counter. She paced across the kitchen again.

"What is taking so long?" she whimpered, praying that her mom wasn't attacking Isabel with an axe, not that they had an axe. They didn't even have fireplace tools, the hammer was in the garage, and you had to go through the kitchen to get there. She went over to the door and listened. She heard her mother's voice but couldn't understand it there. She took out the cedar, fumbled at the lid. Finally got it off, and sniffed it, there was a sound at the door. She almost dropped it.

Isabel stepped out. She looked like she was in a state of shock. Maria offered her the glass of water she had poured previously. Iz took it. She offered the cedar; Iz took that too. She breathed it in and looked up at Maria standing solicitously over her.

She took a breath, "have you ever had a boyfriend before?"

Maria thought, "not seriously."

"So you've never brought a boy home?"

"No."

"Ahh," Isabel took a sip of the water, "I think I just got the talk."

"Oh." Maria sat down and arrogated the water. "Was it bad?"

"I wouldn't really know, I've never done that before."

"Yes."

"I would put it more towards the bad, but, I think it was better that I'm a girl."

"Why?"

"I'm not going to get you pregnant, crucified maybe, but not pregnant."

"Could you?"

"What? You want me to?"

"No! but, could you, you know, with your powers?"

"Maybe, possibly, I might have to do some research…"

"Don't, you really don't have to, I was just wondering."

"It's okay, your mom would kill me. She really would."

"Probably."

"My mom's not that bad, I don't think. Are you coming Friday?"

"I guess. We have to keep it up, not let Valenti think I was lying."

"You're okay with it all?"

"I have Liz, I'll always have her, I think Alex can deal, and maybe I have you now."

"What?"

"We are going to be hanging out together a lot. Maybe we should stop scaring each other."

"But it's so much fun, and trying to kill each other is such great cover."

"Why did he have to raid the eraser room right then?"

"Maybe someone saw us go in and thought nothing was going to happen."

"Nothing did happen, but everyone thinks it did. My friends won't ever look at me again."

"They're all bitches anyways."

"Thank you so much. They're my friends."

"Aren't, if they were your real friends you wouldn't lose them."

"And if you couldn't tell Liz the truth what would she think of your newfound taste in girls?"

"I don't know."

"See, they think I really like you. You, of all people."

"Why do you say that?? What's wrong with me?? Why would _anyone_ be better than me?"

"Grow out your hair."

"What?"

"Grow it out, it'll look better."

"And then I'm eligible to date?"

"No, you'll never be date worthy, but I've got to make the best of what I've got."

"I'm going to hit you sometime, sometime soon."

"Just try it."

"You don't think I could?"

"I could kick your ass."

"Without your powers?"

"With one hand tied behind my back."

"You want to take this outside?"

"Fine."

…

Maria ran into the Crashdown, she had grass in her hair and grass stains on her knees. Max reached out and grabbed her arm.

"Where's my sister?"

"She went home, I'm late, let me go."

"What have you been doing?"

"Fighting."

"Oh? Huh." Maria pushed on to the back. She brushed the grass out of her hair and changed into her waitress outfit. She stepped out of the washroom and Liz caught her.

"You want to go to a movie on Friday?"

"Can't, family dinner with Isabel, sorry." She darted into the dining room. Liz stared after her, she face melding into a grin. 

"They are going out." Liz jumped up and down, "oh yeah!"

School

Isabel stands by her locker, entirely alone. Maria, Max, Liz, and Alex stand together. Alex a little hurt, Liz a little giddy, Max a little uncomfortable. Maria glances over at Isabel. Isabel quickly looks into her locker and busies herself. Isabel's old friends walk past; they ignore her disdainfully. She runs out of the building. Maria sees and reaches… but she's gone. Maria looks at Max. Max nods and runs after Isabel. Liz looks curiously at Maria. Maria turns quickly away and starts going to class.

The Desert

Isabel is leaning against a rock crying. Max sits next to her.

"I hate her. I hate her so much!"

The Evans' House, early evening

Maria knocks hesitantly at the door. Isabel opens it in dark glasses.

"Are you okay?" whispers Maria.

Isabel nods.

"I'm sorry."

"We," her voice cracks, "we just have to figure out a way to solve this."

"Yeah, doing this just isn't practical, and, I'm sorry."

"You already said that."

"This one's in advance."

Dinner

Mrs. Evans is smiling forcedly. Mr. Evans looks like a cat that has had a surprise bucket of water poured on him. Max is angry, but suppressing it. Isabel looks long suffering, and Maria is miserable. There is complete silence. Under the table, Maria is attempting to take Isabel's hand; Isabel is repelling her fiercely.

Finally Mr. Evans sighs. "It's nice to meet you Maria, I would stay, but I have a case to review."

Maria nods into her plate. He gets up and leaves. Mrs. Evans makes a throwing up her hands mini-gesture and follows him out. Max gets up and starts clearing the table.

Maria leans her head against the table.

"Disaster," a mutter comes from her direction.

"How'd you expect it to go? Oh, my daughter is fucking a girl, how wonderful! I just want to take it all back."

"What are you going to say? Oh, it was all a lie to cover up for the fact that I'm an Alien? Do you think they'll like it any better?"

"Go home, Maria, leave me alone."

"Fine. I don't think I want to go out with you ever again!"

"No! You don't get the satisfaction of breaking up with me. I am breaking up with you."

"It's mutual."

"Get out of my house."

"No problem."

Maria's gone. Isabel goes into the living room where her parents are arguing.

"You can stop now. We broke up."

"Oh darling."

"Izzy, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to…"

"It's not your fault. We just don't get along. It was never going to last."

Max comes into Isabel's room where she's sitting in the dark.

"Are you mourning?"

"I'm just tired. I'm glad it's finally over."

"Now someone has to explain to Liz that you were never going out in the first place."

"Why in hell does she think that?"

"It's what she wants to think, I guess. She said something about you being good together."

"Are you kidding me!"

"No, unfortunately."

"Do you ever worry about her?"

"All the time."

"What about why she likes the idea of my dating Maria?"

"What do you mean?"

"Do you think she might have tendencies?"

"Wha… oh, no, Is, don't be gross."

"What if I really was dating Maria?"

"You broke up, remember?"

"If I had been then."

"I don't know."

"Oh."

Liz is on her roof with her diary. _Everything's so strange now. _She writes, _I know I used to have a teensy crush on Maria, but I really don't anymore, so what is it about the idea of Isabel and Maria making out that turns me on? When Max gave me his memories I got one that I couldn't identify. It was more feeling and sensation than anything, like I was inside his body and could feel what he felt. He was kissing a girl and it wasn't anyone I knew or recognized, but I was flooded with feeling for her, and it hasn't gone away. It's so powerful. If I ever saw this girl, well, I might make an extreme fool of myself, it's so uncontrollable. I can't believe Max ever felt that way about anyone. Maybe it was just channeled through him to get to me, from her. I don't understand it, but… she could be my soulmate._

Liz reread what she had written and blushed miserably. She lifted her pen to scribble it all out but paused, and set the pen down. She closed the book and set it down beside her lawn chair. She leaned back and stared up at the sky.

Maria is running home in short bursts, always pausing to wipe her eyes from the tears that won't seem to stop. She enters her front door.

"Maria! Are you all right?"

Maria ignores her mom and runs upstairs. She flops on her bed and pounds the pillow.

"Why!" she sobs, "why do I feel this bad? I hate her. I really do, I always have. What's changed now?" Her mind grins, *you were in love with her.* "No!"

She sobs into her pillow.

School the next day

Isabel walks past with her 'friends', "I was never actually going out with her. I was just playing with her. That eraser room thing was all a big misunderstanding. You can't believe I ever actually *liked* her."

Maria clutches the door to her locker. Liz comes up to her and pats her on the shoulder.

"She's a bitch."

Maria nods.

"We were never really going out anyway."

Liz hugs her. Maria tries not to cry.

"Grandma Claudia is coming next week."

Maria breaks out into sobs; Liz hustles her into the bathroom.

Liz is up on her roof writing again. _It's October 19th. Can life ever go back to normal? Part of me wants safety, wants to go back to how things were, to a life that I could predict, where I know how life is going to be. And the other part of me wants to go somewhere else, into the unknown. _

(At Crashdown Cafe, where Mr. Parker is singing to an old song) 

(Grandma enters) 

LIZ: Grandma! 

GRANDMA: Honeybear!....Oh, hello Jeffrey....oh, you're still listening to them. You're dating yourself. 

MR. PARKER: Well, you know, some things defy time. 

GRANDMA: Oh, look at you. 

LIZ: What? 

GRANDMA: Last year when I left, you were a child. Now I come back to find a beautiful young woman. 

LIZ: Grandma, let me help you upstairs with your stuff. 

GRANDMA: Oh, Jeffrey will get it, won't you dear? 

(Mr. Parker nods) 

LIZ: I thought you weren't supposed to be here until Friday. 

LIZ: Ok, so tell me what's going on. Did you finish that book you were working on last time? 

GRANDMA: Oh, book, schmook. Let's dish. 

(Mrs. Parker walks down the stairs with a basket of laundry) 

MRS. PARKER: Hey Claudia. 

GRANDMA: Nancy, oh it's so good to see you. Hey, come with us. We're going upstairs to catch up. 

MRS. PARKER: Really? Should I? 

LIZ: Yeah, definitely. C'mon mom. 

MRS. PARKER: I don't think so...I have a lot of laundry to do this week. 

GRANDMA: We'll be back just as soon as Liz has told me about all the boys who are head over heels in love with her. 

MRS. PARKER: Don't waste your time because she never talks about that stuff. 

(In Liz's room) 

LIZ: It's just, everything is so confusing right now. I think the Kyle thing is over, and then there's Max, and that's confusing, and…. 

(Grandma waits for Liz to say more) 

LIZ: What? 

GRANDMA: Well, not every relationship has to be the be-all and end-all. 

LIZ: Right.... it doesn't? 

GRANDMA: No...everybody wants to find her soulmate, but there's so much time for that. It's good to try things, you'll find out what you really want.

LIZ: What if there was something else? 

GRANDMA: Something else? 

LIZ: It's not a someone really, yet, it could be, I don't know anything yet, but… 

GRANDMA: Now, this is worth the price of the airfare. 

(Liz looks very embarrassed) 

LIZ: What if this someone else could potentially be...you know, what you said. 

GRANDMA: Is there? 

LIZ: But what if you only have a hint that they exist at all, but there's all this feeling and you can't get rid of it and you don't know where it came from, or even who it's about, or if they're the one? 

GRANDMA: They?

(Liz tenses; Maria opens the door and enters) 

MARIA: Grandma! 

GRANDMA: Oh, Maria! Look at you. Another beauty. God help this poor little town with you two running around. 

MARIA: Ok, I love this woman. 

LIZ: Wait...look at this. It's an article on the first findings of the Navajo Indians in hundreds of years. Lost Treasures by Claudia Parker. It's going to be in the American Journal of Archaeology. 

MARIA: That is so cool… ok, all right, so let's talk about me. The hair thing...does it work for you? I kind of see it as a Meg Ryan style after an electric storm. 

GRANDMA: I think it's you. 

MARIA: She's good. Ok, so what were you guys talking about? 

LIZ: Nothing. 

GRANDMA: Boys. 

MARIA: Oh...Kyle or Max? 

(Liz looks down) 

LIZ: Neither really and not really about boys. 

MARIA: You were talking about me! 

LIZ: No! 

GRANDMA: We weren't, can we now? 

MARIA: No (whimpers) 

GRANDMA: You can tell me. 

LIZ: Maria, if you don't want to talk about it…

MARIA: No, it's okay. 

LIZ: She's just been through a kind of messy breakup.

MARIA: (spits) Not that we were ever actually dating in the first place.

GRANDMA: Have you had lots of comfort food? 

MARIA: No. Liz, why haven't you been feeding me?

LIZ: Don't blame this on me. I helped you make it through school this morning.

GRANDMA: Do I get details, or just vagueness and a lot of theys?

MARIA: Vagueness and a lot of theys.

GRANDMA: Unfair.

MARIA: Liz, you tell her, I'll just be miserable. My mom knows, how much worse can it get?

LIZ: It's complicated.

MARIA: How is it complicated? I… oh, yeah, I guess it is.

LIZ: It started with the car accident. Max's sister Isabel was with Maria in the car, and…

MARIA: She played me. She played me!

LIZ: She did not. You played yourself. You made yourself think that she actually liked you. That she was going out with you because she liked you, not because she was hiding something.

GRANDMA: oh, you liked her?

(Maria nods)

GRANDMA: I can't understand why she didn't feel the same. 

LIZ: Maybe she was just scared.

MARIA: She hates me, she thinks I'm ugly and stupid and obnoxious.

GRANDMA: I'm sure she doesn't think that, and it doesn't seem like it was honest. Does she know how you feel?

MARIA: I don't think so, I never told her.

GRANDMA: Maybe she's just protecting herself. (Maria runs her finger along a seam in Liz's bedspread) And you, Liz. Are you following your friend's example?

LIZ: Getting into messy relationships, yes, with Evanses definitely.

GRANDMA: how about trying new things?

LIZ: No… one to try them with. Maybe if there was someone to try it with, the one to try it with, who… who I've been feeling. She's getting closer, but I have no idea what I'll do when she gets here.

MARIA: Liz, what the…

LIZ: You're not the only one who can fall for a girl!

MARIA: But who?

LIZ: I don't know yet.

MARIA: You are so confusing.

GRANDMA: I agree. You've had a feeling that a girl that you're going to fall in love with is coming to Roswell?

LIZ: More than a feeling, and I'm already in love with her.

Maria, Liz, and Grandma Claudia are sitting in the Crashdown having some fries. Isabel walks in with Max and Michael. Maria flinches.

"That was Isabel," Liz points out to her grandmother. "You should go talk to her."

"She's not even looking at me."

"Max doesn't know you actually like her, maybe she doesn't either."

"Max is a dolt. She knows; I know she knows and she doesn't care. She hates me."

"How many times have you said that? Go find out."

"No."

"Come on."

"No."

"Wait until you get her alone."

"No, I'm just going to get over her. I'll find someone else. Liz will you go out with me?"

"What?"

"Please."

"Are you trying to make her jealous or something?"

"No."

"I am not going out with you until you figure this out."

"You're never going out with me, are you?"

"Nope, sorry."

"Hi."

"Hi."

Isabel and Maria eye each other warily.

"Why did you want to talk to me?"

"I don't know, it's just me being stupid I guess."

"Why?"

"I was thinking, we were officially going out for two full days."

"Yes."

"And I never got to kiss you."

"What!"

"It's kind of a matter of pride. I'd like to have kissed Isabel Evans."

"But what about me?"

"Huh?"

"Would you like to kiss me?"

"I would."

"Okay."

"Oh, all right."

Maria leaned hesitantly forward. Isabel slipped her arm around her waist and pulled her in.

Then there were the flashes, but that's another story. 


End file.
